These past few years have been emotionally grueling and challenging for most us. Businesses are dealing with the Great Resignation where too many good employees are quitting their day jobs in pursuit of their dreams or, at least, something different. But for those of us struggling with infertility, the overall feeling that life is short and you need to make things happen Right Now, can be even more overwhelming.
Use these 5 lost superpowers to refresh your battle with infertility in the new year.
If curiosity is our fast-pass to learning, then you have an opportunity to learn all that you can about fertility and the treatments available. Try removing the stress and disappointment that you need help, and instead focus on how the technologies available are fascinating. There’s one that will work for your unique needs. Remember to keep an eye on the clock as fertility decreases with age. If you are under 35 and have been trying for a year or 35 or older and trying for just 6 months, seek help. Do your research and make an appointment with a fertility clinic.
If you are struggling with fertility, you’ve most likely already had a lesson in this. Don’t let a miscarriage thwart your efforts, just double down and try again. If you’ve had two miscarriages in a row, make an appointment with a fertility expert. Learn to treat a failure as an opportunity to learn something about your body and try something different. People that seek professional and keep going with treatments are the ones that have success. Learn and grow and if you fall, get back up again.
Be honest about your goal to have a baby, your loss if a treatment doesn’t work, your feelings through the process. You are not alone. Anger is natural and you are entitled to feel it. Allow yourself some down time to cope with it. When you’re ready, if you can instead communicate your fears and disappointment, you’ll have a better chance of getting empathy. Lean into people and give them a chance to care, you’ll feel better about the outcome.
Like most life experiences, infertility is a teacher. Not only are you learning more about your reproductive system, but you’re discovering a world of other people going through what you’re experiencing. And it stinks but also makes babies and the miracle of life more precious. You didn’t get here by choice but perhaps the path you’re on will make you a better parent and a better human.
Playfulness is what makes kittens and puppies adorable. Don’t lose your sense of humor in this process, especially if you are going through infertility with your partner. Creativity, spontaneity and joy are energizing and necessary. Take time off and plan activities and date nights that will not be possible once your hard-fought baby finally arrives. Stay up all night and watch the sunrise – then sleep all day.
We find most people struggling with infertility will succeed in having a child. It may look different than the path you’re on; you may need to use donor eggs or donor sperm or you may decide to adopt. But eventually you’ll move on from this challenge, likely to another one. Your battle with infertility, though intense and often frustrating, is temporary. If you embrace these 5 superpowers to accomplish your goal, they are yours to keep for life.